Unexpected Guilt

Posted on Fri Oct 4th, 2024 @ 10:01pm by Dolphineer Nerlyn & Bronze Rider K'ron
Edited on on Fri Oct 4th, 2024 @ 10:08pm

Mission: 3531 AL
Location: RCW
Timeline: M1 D28

Nerlyn was confused as she came in from the sea climbing up the ladder from the pier, the Weyr was quiet, deathly quiet. She frowned a little but didn’t think anything of it, as she wandered back to her weyr. Maybe more wings were on drills than she thought today.

“K’ron?” She called as she came in when no one answered her she shrugged. Obviously, he was doing paperwork in his office. She glanced out to see Tyreth but he wasn’t there either. With a small annoyed frown, she went to the ledge and looked out. “Ah...” She realised what had obviously happened while she had been out in the Sea with Oceanian, Zalyith had risen and by the looks of it, Tyreth might have won as she could see most other dragons on their ledges sulking. She sighed a little, nothing she could do anymore, she had accepted that a turn and a half ago when she had lost Leaneth. She turned from the ledge, she needed a wash to get the salt off of her skin and hair.

K'ron yawned a bit as he walked back to his weyr. He was sure Jena had enjoyed herself as had he. He had forgotten how a gold flight could affect you. Now though he just wanted to be home with Nerlyn.

He stepped into the weyr and looked around, not sure if Nerlyn would be home yet or not. He soon heard soft splashing and smiled. "Ner?" He asked. Nerlyn had been scrubbing her hair when she heard the familiar footsteps of her mate. He would find her eventually she mused as she ducked under the water. K'ron followed the sounds and grinned when he finally spotted his mate. He sat down on the edge of the tub and waited until she was done.

"Enjoy the flight?" She asked turning as she finished rinsing her hair. K'ron had pulled his knees up to rest his chin on them.

"It was an unexpected win. Must say I forgot how powerful gold flights were if you win," he said, watching her. Nerlyn nodded looking at the water not sure what to say.

"I didn't even know. I was too far from the coast." She admitted.

"It was probably better that way," he agreed. He was glad she hadn't been caught up in the flight. He would have felt awful if he hadn't been able to be there for her. Nerlyn sighed softly and scrubbed her arms.

"Suppose so... You okay?" She asked finally looking up at him. Her eyes looked a little unsure.

"How was your day?" he asked, not wanting to talk about the flight. He didn't want to bring up bad memories for Nerlyn. The Dolphineer looked at him as she swept her hair up into a bun and secured it up out of the way.

"Was out doing a weather sweep." She admitted with a grin. "Are you sure you are okay?" She asked looking at him carefully.

"How did that go?" K'ron nodded a bit. "I am. Jena and I just got caught up after we woke. You're not mad are you?" He asked. Nerlyn paled at the question. How could she be bad? She had no right to be.

"It went okay... Didn't drown." She said trying to sound brighter than she felt. "K'ron I have no idea how to feel about it." She admitted. "Do you want to join me?" The bronze rider nodded and got undressed, slipping into the water with his mate. How pulled her into his arms.

"This is where I want to be." Nerlyn looked at him unsure for a second before nodding.

"I know." Deep down she knew that the Bronze Rider wanted her and only her. Sometimes it was a relief to not be so sharp-tongued anymore. He kissed her hair. He hated being pulled away from her.

"Just don't ever forget that I love you," he whispered. Nerlyn nodded slowly, she knew that deep down, she just hated that she couldn't share that part of his life. She used to enjoy flights because it brought her closer to Leaneth and if Tyreth won his rider, who she loved with all her being. Flights were still a very hard thing to deal with and K'ron was glad for the most part Tyreth didn't win. He kissed Nerlyn's hair. "Ty's gonna be a daddy," he commented, thinking about the fact his bronze was going to sire a clutch. Nerlyn smiled at that thought, it was about time he deserved a little bit of recognition as a Wingleader.

"Only what you deserve Ki." She whispered trying to find her voice.

He chuckled softly. "You know Ty won't stop reminding us," he smiled. He didn't know how she did it, but somehow Nerlyn never seemed upset about spending time with Ty and Koda." He knew his bronze would talk to her from time to time. "How's your dolphin partner doing?" Nerlyn nodded, Oceanian hadn't let her drown as of yet so it was good.

"Sorry... I'm okay." She assured stepping back to carry on cleaning up. "This is just the first time it's a major flight." She whispered wishing she sounded less sad about it.

He nodded. "I know. I am grateful that Ty doesn't like to chase much. I couldn't stop a gold flight though." K'ron blew out a breath. This was hard. Nerlyn smiled sadly.

"Ki... I know that. I'm sorry." Nerlyn said softly. Before she lost Leaneth she would have fought argued and never said she was sorry.

"No reason to be sorry," he said. He knew she was still battling this as well. Nerlyn sighed and sat down her chin hitting the water.

"There are a lot of reasons to be." She sighed softly. He seemed calm enough for after a flight.

K'ron shook his head. "Ner, we're together. That's all that matters." Maybe it was better that he had spent more time with Jena after the flight to calm down. The Dolphineer frowned.

"Yes, that is good... That's a good point." She conceded softly turning away.

K'ron was confused. "Did I do something wrong?' He asked softly. She seemed upset.

"No you and just calm and controlled and I have no right to be jealous..." She whispered with a small tut at herself.

He flushed a bit. "Ner," he said softly, reaching over to run his hand through her hair. "Now that I'm calm I can show you how much I love you," he grinned. Nerlyn looked away.

"I have no right to be jealous and you show me anyhow." She countered. He pulled her close and kissed her gently.

"I think it's cute that you're jealous. But I promise you have no reason to be." Nerlyn sighed softly and pulled away again frustrated by her inability to turn that emotion off, she was jealous of Jena getting to spend those candlemarks with her mate, especially after the flight. It hurt because the gold rider was nothing more than a teenager. It was frustrating.

"It's not cute." She sighed softly. K'ron pulled back to look down at her.

"Ner? Come on," he said. "You're the only one in my life," he smiled.

"I am not angry or frustrated with you K'ron... it's myself." She said softly. She was all those things with herself. "I want to be happy for you and Tyreth but I am jealous and guilty." The bronze rider hadn't considered that. It must have been awful for her. He caught her arm and pulled her back into his arms.

"Ner it's to be expected. Don't worry." Nerlyn sighed as she was pulled back against his chest and sighed as she rested her cheek against his chest. What was she to do when he was trying to be so understanding it was making her feel guiltier about being guilty and angry at herself. It was a vicious circle that she couldn't get out of. K'ron didn't know what else to say. He knew he wouldn't be able to convince her if she didn't want to be convinced. "I am going to get out and let you wash up... when you are done I will be waiting." She breathed hoping he understood. K'ron took a step back to let her move.

"Alright. I won't be long." He just needed a quick cleanup. Nerlyn nodded and moved away from him. She quietly got out of the pool and wrapped a towel around her leaving the small chamber.